Giving Yourself Permission

Doing something out of the ordinary, going a little off piste or stretching out of your comfort zone, will no doubt have those around you wondering whether you have truly lost the plot.

Sometimes you reach that point where you need to break out of the conforming box and be creative, spread your wings and look out on the horizon and see the vision of your future life.

The fire in your belly sparks up and seeps into your cells and your body begins to tingle at the excitement of your dreams coming true.

The point where you feel a bit further ahead, but then you come out of your day dream with a thud and realise you are back in your unhappy (ish) place.

Even though you have a ton of things to be grateful for, your spirit is not alive and you know it’s time for change. (That’s really not such a scary word. It may feel it, and if so then I recommend finding a more suitable word to try; e.g. transition, develop or switch).

Whatever language you use, you had just taken a step forward imagining your future life and it felt great.

But back here in your reality, your are trapped with guilt, suffocated with fears, worried about what other people will think of you and the judgement heading your way.

You feel like you are waiting for that nod from someone or something, that ‘YES’, to make you feel that it’s ok to pursue your desires and break out of your regular life to make it not so regular anymore.

You desperately need a change in your work situation, balanced with the safety and stability, but deep down you know you need a shift and you would like to have a business.

One that works with your personal life, because you can’t go on like this working for someone else. You’ve had enough of sacrificing your life, leaving nothing left in terms of quality for either you or your loved ones.

Here’s the thing, you can give you yourself permission to do anything you want to. Something that fires you up, to do work you love, however that looks and feels to you. You are a responsible adult in charge or your own life.

I remember when I was on the payroll, I admired everyone around me who worked for themselves who had the flexibility to run their day how they wanted to shape it. They had the freedom to choose when they worked so they could have a personal life and spend time with friends, family and loved ones.

I wanted a piece of that pie. I had known that in my bones for years. I also remember waiting for someone to give me permission to go ahead and follow my heart to try and work for myself.

Needless to say it never came because I realised it was under my control to give myself permission to live my life how I wanted to do.

I tousled with feelings that I would let people down, my employer who had been incredibly kind and supportive to me, my father who I thought wouldn’t understand, sadly my mother wasn’t around to ask as she’s passed, but I know she would have been on the YAY camp, and my friends & family who thought I would have finally gone bonkers!

Apart from that all being in my head and me assuming their answers and reactions, with no evidence to base it on, underneath I came to the realisation that none of them are going to give me the permission I was waiting for.

This big authority person I thought would say yes Amanda, now is the time you can leave the paycheck, embrace your creativity, and go for it. Things will be up and down, you’ll be on a huge learning curve, you’ll be supported in more ways than you can imagine, and you will be ok. Trust me.

No, that never happened. Looking back and joining the dots, that is what I have learnt.

But it takes one key step first.

You have to give yourself permission to lead your own life.

No one else is as interested in your life as much as you. They are living their own. They love and support you and have your best interests at heart and don’t want you to risk your safety and security.

Imagine what you would do if it was possible?

Let me reassure you; anything can happen.

Give yourself permission to take one step towards your dreams today and see what unfolds.

Take a risk out of your comfort zone.

Let go of the worries, park and put them down for 5 minutes while you move ahead.

Notice what happens, how you’re feeling and acknowledge all you’ve achieved in that small, yet victorious step.

Celebrate the small wins and plan when you’re going to take the next - give yourself permission to create the life you wish for. Its your birthright.